Online Premarital Counseling for Engaged Couples Throughout Texas

Every couple is different, but these are the conversations that tend to matter most:

• Conflict. How each of you fights, how you shut down, and how you repair. Disagreements are normal. What matters is what happens next.
• Money. Spending and saving styles, debt, joint versus separate accounts, and financial obligations to parents or extended family.
• Family of origin. What each of you learned growing up about love, anger, affection, and apology, and which of those lessons you want to keep.
• Faith and culture. What you believe, how you'll practice (or not), and how you'll honor both backgrounds in your home.
• Intimacy. Expectations about affection and sex, differences in desire, and how comfortable you are talking about any of it.
• Roles. Careers, household labor, whose job takes priority, and who moves for whom.
• Children. Whether, when, and how many, and how you'd want to raise them.
• In-laws and extended family. How involved they'll be, where the boundaries are, and how you'll handle it when you don't agree.

You don't have to agree on everything. You do need to know where you differ and have a way to talk about it. If talking itself is the hard part, you might also look at communication problems.

Marrying across faiths, cultures, or communities brings real richness, and real negotiation. Questions like which traditions you'll observe, how you'll raise children, or what to say to a grandparent who hoped you'd marry within the community deserve thoughtful conversation before the wedding, not after.

I work with many South Asian couples and understand South Asian family and community dynamics: parents who are deeply involved in decisions, expectations about living near or with family, wedding plans that grow to include hundreds of guests and opinions, and a strong sense of duty to care for aging parents. I also work with Muslim couples (Ismaili, Sunni, and Shia), including couples whose families practice differently from one another.

My aim is never to pick a side between you and your families. It's to help the two of you get clear on what you want your marriage to look like, and to support you in holding that with love when others have different ideas. Sessions are in English. You can read more on my multicultural issues and spirituality pages.

My work with premarital couples draws on the Gottman Method, in which I've completed Level 1 training, along with Emotionally Focused Therapy, mindfulness, and practical skill-building. In practice, that looks like:

• Gottman-informed conversations about friendship, managing conflict, and the shared meaning you want to build together
• Noticing the attachment needs underneath your disagreements, like wanting to feel chosen, safe, or respected
• Learning to pause and get curious when you're triggered, rather than reacting on autopilot
• Practicing new ways of talking to each other in session, with me there to coach

You'll talk to each other more than you talk to me. I may suggest conversations to continue at home between sessions. The point is to spot your patterns early, while they're still flexible, and to resolve conflict in ways that leave you closer instead of further apart.

Ideally, start several months before your wedding, so you aren't trying to process big questions in the same week as the final dress fitting. That said, there's no wrong time. Some couples start right after the engagement, and others come in during the first year of marriage.

As with all new couples, I require a free phone consultation before your first appointment, and both partners attend from the start. I recommend weekly sessions at first. On average, couples attend a minimum of six to eight sessions, though you're welcome to continue longer if it's helpful. Sessions are $230 for 45 to 55 minutes, and I'm out of network for all insurance.

You don't need to be getting married to do this work. I see couples who are moving in together, committing to a long-term partnership, or blending families. I welcome same-gender couples and couples with a nonbinary or transgender partner. Sessions are held on my secure telehealth platform.

If you'd like a head start, try one of these over dinner. Not all at once.

• What did arguments look like in your house growing up, and how did they end?
• How much should our parents know about our finances, our fights, or our plans?
• What does a good Sunday look like to you ten years from now?
• When you're hurt, what do you most need from me, and what makes it worse?
• Which family traditions feel essential to you, and which are you happy to let go?

Notice not just the answers, but how it feels to ask. If a question gets tense quickly, that's a good one to bring into session.

No. Wedding planning is one of the most stressful projects many couples ever take on together, and it tends to bring every family dynamic to the surface at once. If you're arguing more than usual, that isn't a sign you're wrong for each other. It's information about where you'll need support.

Coming to premarital counseling isn't an admission that something is broken. It's a decision to take your marriage as seriously as you're taking the wedding.